‘I wanted to go back to the real me, Amanda Goff. Yet there was just one problem. I had no idea who she was. I had no idea who I was. I hadn’t been Amanda for years, decades. Samantha wasn’t leaving just yet; she wasn’t going to make a quiet exit. She wasn’t that type of woman.’

Amanda Goff was a successful journalist in London and Sydney before ditching her nine-to-five job at the age of 38 to become Samantha X, Australia’s most famous escort. A bipolar diagnosis changed everything: she retired from sex work, walked away from Samantha X, and went in search of Amanda. 

Misfit is her third memoir – but the first written as ‘herself’. Raw, honest, provocative, wise and often laugh-out-loud funny, this is an unflinching record of her journey along the bumpy path to healing and self-acceptance. Beyond confronting her bipolar disorder and addiction issues, Amanda must also contend with prejudice and judgement, lingering trauma from her earlier life, and her own crushing self-doubt. As she struggles with the realities of so-called normality, the persistent voice of Samantha X is there to remind her of a former life that offered power, money, fame – and protection from the challenges that Amanda has courageously chosen to tackle head-on.